The Happiness Project

I'm already incredibly inspired by the book The Happiness Project (which I received for Christmas) by Gretchen Rubin.  The introduction actually made me kind of skeptical.  She kept saying how she WAS happy, but she just wanted to be more appreciative of her life and be fully aware that she was happy.  I guess this struck me as sort of over the top.  Like, "Geesh. If you know you're happy, then you're happy.  You're trying too hard if you think you have to constantly be aware of being happy."  The thing is, that's what practically everyone said to her when she started the project.  Yes, even her husband.  Nobody got it.  As soon as I started reading the first chapter though, I got it.  I think she knew she should be happy, but she didn't feel happy unless she was reminding herself of why she should be happy.  That I can understand.

Some people may not find this as appealing as I do, but I love how she structured this project.  Everything she did was based on research - LOTS of research.  Also, she was very systematic about how she went about her goals.  She kept lists and charts (love that).  Again, this is probably not everyone's personality, but it spoke directly to me.

She started with energy.  She recognized, and her research supported, that having more energy would not only make her feel happier and able to face the day with a better attitude, but would also make it more likely that she would accomplish the rest of her goals.

The book starts like this, " I'd always vaguely expected to outgrow my limitations.  One day, I'd stop twisting my hair, and wearing running shoes all the time, and eating exactly the same food every day.  I'd remember my friends' birthdays, I'd learn Photoshop, I wouldn't let my daughter watch TV during breakfast.  I'd read Shakespeare. I'd spend more time laughing and having fun, I'd be more polite, I'd visit museums more often, I wouldn't be scared to drive."

I LOVE that.

My version would go something like this:  I'd always expected that one day I'd be a "put together" adult.  One day, I'd cook real meals for myself and stop eating cereal for dinner.  One day, I'd dress professionally and have stylish, but classic and simple clothes to wear for every occasion.  One day, I'd learn how to use the Photoshop Elements software I'd gotten for my birthday several years ago, I'd be better at documenting my life in a fun, but useful way, I'd consistently send birthday cards and gifts on time and to ALL the people I love.  I'd exercise, be able to do a push-up, take vitamins, drink enough water and go to bed at a decent hour so I could stop taking naps at every possible moment.  I'd stop spending an hour staring at my phone before bed at night and take the advice that screen time before bed is really not helpful to sleep.  One day, I'd be more sociable and be better in large groups and maybe even date a guy I'd met in real life.  I'd figure out investments and insurance and be more responsible with money."

As Gretchen points out, constantly having these things in the back of our minds that we SHOULD be doing, is incredibly draining on our energy and our happiness.

You've got to read the book. I can't explain it all as well as she can.

The point is, I have 3 goals for this month.

1.  Drink More Water.  This one is going to be very hard for me. So often, I get to lunchtime and realize I haven't opened my water bottle that day.  I take a few sips at lunch and then it gets forgotten until I go home.  I want to drink one bottle full before noon, one more bottle before 4 and then a final bottle before 9.  I can't remember how many ounces are in my water bottle. It doesn't matter right now. However much it is will be more than I'm getting now.

2.  Exercise Regularly.  Thankfully, I started on this one last year and the year before.  Unless I get sick, I've been doing fairly well with this.  I just want to make sure it becomes a consistent habit.  I want to go to 3 classes at the Y each week.  (Each class is about 1 hour.) On the weekend, I can go to a class or dance in my apartment or go for a walk.  I just have to do something active for 30 minutes.

3.  Implement a Relaxing Nighttime Routine (Including Going to Bed at 10:30).  This will be the hardest by far for me.   I've developed a tentative schedule to try, but the most important parts are that I want to have only low lights on and no screens in front of my face for an hour before I get into bed.  I don't think it's a good idea for me to read once I get in bed because I get too caught up in books. However, I also want to break the habit of going on Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram before I fall asleep.  This will be hard because I hate waiting for sleep to come.  After even just 1 minute, I get impatient and start worrying that I will never fall asleep.  I'm going to try putting music on.

The 3rd goal is important for 2 reasons.  1)  I will get more sleep.  2) I will feel more in control of my life.  Although I feel like I'm doing what I want when I fall asleep on the couch after school and eat a random dinner at 8 pm and then stare at the computer until 11:30 when I finally manage to get myself ready for bed, it does not make me feel happy.  Order makes me feel happy.

So, I have printed some charts to document these goals this month.  They will hang on my refrigerator and each night I will record my progress.  In special ed, as long as the trend is towards the goal, we're OK.  If I am consistently falling below the aimline, I'll have to intervene.  Not achieving a goal and not doing anything to try and change the outcome is NOT acceptable. ;)